Cold Comfort

(Vintage appliance logo for Sears' Coldspot® refrigerator line)

Awaiting apprisal on my father's condition --he having been released only moments ago from hospital care for ulcer management-- I find distraction in the sunny images of a June 1956 McCall's ("The Magazine of Togetherness").  Feast on these ice cream and/or beverage-themed minutiae from its pages -- and read my related, if not outlandish proposal to a local outreach program seeking to make "gains" (literal and metaphorical) in eating disorder treatment and awareness.  Sent by e-mail to the executive director of this not-for-profit (as well as to my sister and a friend), the following is the conversation we exchanged electronically over three sweltering days in late July.

McCall's June 1956, p. 150 (detail)

From:  Lorena S.

Message:  A small Kickstarter:  gaining #'s by way of Dorman's Dairy Dream

Mulling over a sponsorship program for recovery, Project AnorexiCone, perhaps, in which I eat at Dorman's daily for a month.  Donors to the program would receive my original artwork; I'd post photos of me with my ice cream on an Instagram feed.  Silly  but also serious.  Anyway, I want to kill two birds with one stone-- help others, myself, and maybe bring some attention to the issue.  I could certainly use the motivator of being held accountable.  Maybe not the healthiest way to go, but it could be an interesting approach to this crazy situation and help me raise funding for a future elsewhere.  Is this just totally ridiculous?

From:  Jennifer S.

Reply:  A small Kickstarter:  gaining #'s by way of Dorman's Dairy Dream

I'll donate.  Not sure you can use Kickstarter though.  They have very particular rules about what constitutes a project and anything similar to funding moves etc. doesn't count.  You may get money to pay for the ice cream though.  Look into it.

From:  Mary O.

Reply:  A small Kickstarter:  gaining #'s by way of Dorman's Dairy Dream

Gee, Lorena, I don't know.  It's a creative idea and gets me thinking about using such an approach to fund our new Eating Disorders Association of Maine -- however, I don't know you and would have to defer to those who do…  Would this be good for you?

As an aside, if you look at EDAM's website, you'll see some photography.  Their board has spoken about wanting to include original art by people who have struggled with one or more of these illnesses.  If you ever would like to donate a piece to be included for consideration, please let me know.

All the very best,

Mary

McCall's June 1956, p. 120 (detail)

From:  Lorena S.

2nd Message:  A small Kickstarter:  gaining #'s by way of Dorman's Dairy Dream

Mary,

You are right to hesitate, as I have been flirting with something like this for at least a year now.  Initially, I wanted to use Kickstarter for a campaign called Milk Money, in which concerned parties would chip-in so that I might buy (and, naturally, consume) a milkshake per day.  I once told Dr. B. that me drinking such a thing would be the equivalent of seeing me leap from a tall building (as far as risk and fear are concerned).  But I have had several people suggest locally-made shakes (as opposed to fast food versions) because such things include relatively wholesome ingredients (such as milk, obviously).  At any rate, I was all gung-ho about the Dorman's idea last night but now again am thinking it's a weird, tacky vanity project.  I think that hearing about the fellow who raised thousands for making potato salad has shot my head into the clouds.  I suppose I figured that people would forgive the charity angle as long as they were indeed receiving art in exchange for funding -- and I know nothing gets me feeling accountable quite like the double spotlight of sponsorship AND publication via social media.  I wonder if anyone would realize how much of an unprecedented move this would be for me -- or if, instead, I would inspire viewers to scoff in disdain.  To be quite honest, I might rather put-together something titled Part of A Complete Breakfast in order to ensure that I truly eat a healthful meal during the day, as I still reserve most of my food for the late evening hour.  However, the logistics of such a campaign are less easily outlined, and certainly not as headline-grabbing as the ice cream route.  But, again, I was writing on a lark and likely won't do it (unless I hear resoundingly positive feedback, of course, which is doubtful).  But I know I am in a position to help bring awareness to a taboo subject that many refer to as their deepest shame and undoing.

Striving for change,

Lorena

McCall's June 1956, p. 122

From:  Mary O.

2nd Reply:  A small Kickstarter:  gaining #'s by way of Dorman's Dairy Dream

Hi Lorena,

I get it -- and I'm so pleased that you are still striving! 

I do like the idea of having, rather than ice cream, a complete breakfast. 

Maybe first eat breakfast, then after awhile add - dare I suggest it - lunch. 

And then - when possible - dinner.  Three actual meals a day.  Ah! Success!

All the best,

Mary

McCall's June 1956, p. 119

From:  Greta V.C.

Reply:  A small Kickstarter:  gaining #'s by way of Dorman's Dairy Dream

If I ate Dorman's every day for even just a few days, I'd feel really sick.  It would probably be worse for you than what you're doing now.

I don't think you need Kickstarter for this, although a chunk of money is always nice.  You just need to know that we are all relying on you to take care of yourself, and we are.  I like the Instagram idea though!  Why not add to your daily intake and Instagram your meals?  But no cheating.  You have to eat whatever you post.

McCall's June 1956, p. 14 (detail)

From:  Lorena S.

3rd Message:  A small Kickstarter:  gaining #'s by way of Dorman's Dairy Dream

Yeah, you're likely right.  Ice cream is not the best band-aid.  Oddly enough, Mom just won a twenty-five dollar gift certificate to The Camden Cone.  Talk about serendipity!  It expires in October 2016, so that gives me some time to get my act together (ha).

"Missed Opportunities" or "Too Late", acrylic on 16" x 12" canvas, 2011 
(with spoon added August 2014, shortly after writing this entry)